My Christmas Vacation!!!

Most people go away over Christmas. Maybe see some family or go to a tropical island. I spent my vacation healing from having my ass operated on. If you read my previous post you will learn that I had a chronic anal fissure, A cut or rip have you in my sphincter. Nothing I did worked, botox, nitroglycerin, love letters, etc. I met with Doctor Sack on December 13th. He informed me that surgery was my only option. Yes my doctor's name is Sack. Even funnier is his first name is Johnny. You either get the joke or you don't. Anyway on December 20th I went in for surgery. The surgery was two parts. First Johnny cut the sphincter muscle so that there would be fewer spasms. This was causing my horrific pain. Next Johnny covered the fissure with a piece of nice healthy skin. I know this all sounds very complicated but the whole thing took 20 minutes. I was put under what is called twilight. The only way to describe it is to say it was the best sleep of my life.

I have no recollection of the surgery. I remember having an IV put in and that is it. When I woke up I felt fine. Only weird thing was I could not feel my penis at all. It was like it was asleep. Must have been the pain blockers I was given. Johnny came by as I was getting ready to leave and told me the surgery was a success. He got in there and fixed the problem. I shouldn't have a problem ever again. He did however mention that taking a dump during the next few days may really suck since it was a fresh wound and I had stitches.

It turned out my biggest fear was the fear itself. Shitting is now fine for me but the fact that for the first week I was in total fear of going to the bathroom really made life suck. I would literally wince whenever I had a gopher peaking. I have learned a lot over this holiday season. Be nice to your fellow man, karma is a bitch, and never ever take your ass for granted. I swear from this day forward I will show my ass the love it deserves.